Just can’t shake that feeling of being totally “off”?
Maybe it’s been a weird day … or week … or most of your thirties bit the big one.
If it seems like you’ve drifted away from who you are … only to find yourself on a desert island of WTF: don’t worry! There is a raft heading your way right now.
First, we need to look at the root cause of why we feel off in the first place. Like how did we end up here with our tattered shirt wrapped around our head, trying to spear fish with our house key?
How did we end up feeling like a completely unrecognizable version of ourselves?
1. What are you doing to throw yourself off?
Take a long hard look at what you’ve been doing in the past few months and weeks (or years) leading up to this lost-self-scenario.
My example would be that I used to take on every project I’d ever wanted to do ALL AT ONCE and proceed to give myself a deadline of yesterday. Time waits for no one I used to tell myself. A couple weeks into this self-imposed boot camp I’m bedridden—binge watching Netflix and wearing the same clothes from last week.
The point is that the patterns are easy to spot once we look for them. Can you say warning signs?!
2. Are you pushing yourself too hard?
Throwing yourself off meet pushing yourself too hard. I’m sure you two will get along great. You have so much in common.
We all know that pushing leads to collapse or burnout or collapse and burnout. Even inanimate objects experience this. As an example, did you know that if you push a coffee maker too hard and make it pump out cup after cup without a break that it will eventually start projectile vomiting water across your kitchen counter? Or, so I’ve heard.
Anyway, we all know that pushing ourselves too hard is a recipe for disaster. Look at what you can do in pieces, one after the other.
How can you space projects out so that you have time to breathe in between?
When can you take time off even if it’s just an afternoon to spend in the park?
Awareness is key so make sure to be on alert for when you’re pushing yourself as opposed to having a healthy motivation for your schedule.
3. Are you asking for help?
Our society can no longer worship the individual. The individual is part of the whole. The individual is part of the group and community that we need so much.
We need that collaboration and support.
We need to feel connected to others as we go for our dreams in life.
Collaboration, community and relationships are the most important principles in life today—aside from sharing love. Without our community behind or with us, we are always going to feel lost or off.
Find your people—whether it’s a social group, exercise group, political group or spiritual group—stay connected. Ask for help. Reach out and do things with others who have a common goal.
4. Getting that desperate feeling
Sometimes we start to panic and feel really out of it. Maybe we’ve gone so far that we can’t really find our way back home to ourselves. Its ok, we’ve all been there. The way back is to reconnect to our True Self.
Find time in the morning or at night to breathe deeply and envision roots growing from your feet into the centre of the earth.
Spend time with your eyes closed and feel the communion with your True Self. Do this regularly so that you always maintain that connection. The source of most anxiety and feeling of confusion is due to the fact that we’ve disconnected from who we really are.
5. What do you love?
What you love is who you are.
What you love is an expression of your life.
When you connect to that, you are connected to your True Self, your core.
This is the quickest way to feel like yourself again:
Reaffirm what you love.
Make a list.
Make plans to express what you love in the world.
You can’t feel out of it when you are doing or being what you love—it is impossible.
Try to use these five tips as a maintenance tool or a sign post—when you start to feel wobbly go back to one of these steps. And the thing to remember is that no matter how off you may feel, you are never far from your True Self.
Remember: YOU are home.
I would love to hear how you connect to yourself or what you love. Share below in the comments!