Posts tagged #single

What You Think is Harmless: Is Actually Killing Your Chances to Meet Your True Mate

I’m ok being single.

I like my independence.

I like where I am.

How do often do you say that to yourself to beat back your actual thoughts?

Is he really out there?

Do I deserve to be cherished?

Why am I not attracting the guy?

Looking on the “positive” side …

Making the “best” of the situation …

Staying up beat all the time …

Is Killing your Chances of Meeting Your True Mate

If you’re not willing to admit to yourself how much you want to be met by your beloved,

If you’re not able to declare how much you desire an equal partnership where you cherish each other,

If you can’t even say out loud that you desire to be with a love who respects you,

Then How Will You and the Universe Call in Your Sacred Relationship?

You don’t want to be positive: you want to be taking day trips on weekends with your true love

You don’t want to make the best of being alone for yet another holiday season: you want to be snuggled up on the couch watching Game of Thrones with your beloved

You don’t want to stay upbeat: you want to spend your days apart texting each other love emojis and feeling excited butterflies

Stop Denying Yourself Your Desires by Being Positive or Staying Upbeat or Making the Best of it

Why? Because it’s all a cop out and a lie. 

You’re lying to yourself and pushing all your ACTUAL desires further and further away.

I used to lie to myself all the time. 

I thought it was the only way to keep my vibration high.

I ended up having one dysfunctional relationship after another through my 20s and 30s and spent most of my late 30s/early 40s single and alone: All While “Looking on the Bright Side.”

Until I was able to get real with myself and heal the deep pain and give voice to the way I truly wanted to live my life, I stayed in this painful pattern.

And now I live with the love of my life where each day gets better and better

And now I experience my desires in real time of someone who loves me for who I am

And now I spend my days cooking with him and going away on weekends and traveling to amazing places--living my relationship dreams!

This is what is possible for you!

I understand the agony of denial from personal experience and from my 20 years of professional experience as a Counselor, Healer and Intuitive.

I know the only way out of it is to stop all those BS coping skills and connect with clarity, purpose and conviction to your desires.

This is the journey I take you on in my powerful 1:1 work with clients. 

Get honest

Get clear

Get into action

Meet your True Mate

Simple, but not easy. That’s why I’m here to hold your hand every step of the way. 

If this resonates I would love to talk to you so you can let this be your last holiday alone while pasting a smile on your face and being incredibly upbeat.  

Posted on September 4, 2019 .

An open letter to Singles on Valentine's Day

How do you make it through the day when the whole world is in Love EXCEPT for you?

First of all, you and I both know that not everyone is in love—there are at least two of us sitting here right now and there may be dozens more out there. Regardless of the facts, it IS what Hallmark Cards, Lindt Chocolate and De Beers Diamonds wants you to feel like. Which is why we have to stick together like that saying goes: misery loves company.

Here are my two cents on what it's like to be single on Valentine's Day: it sucks. And any Single who says they don't care is a liar.

1. My promise to you in this letter

  • I will NOT tell you that all you need to do is love yourself.
  • I will NOT tell you to look for the hidden blocks to love that keep you from meeting “The One.”
  • And I certainly WILL NOT tell you how awesome it is to be single.

2. Pick up a Valentine's Day Survival pack

  • 1 box of tissues (let's not even try to deny that this won't be needed at some point).

  • Netflix account or access to your 1990s DVD collection of Romantic Movies. For example, Pretty Woman or Sleepless in Seattle (don't go halfway on this; you want to use up all of the tissues).

  • Your favorite blanket and slippers, preferably unwashed so that you can feel especially sorry for yourself.

  • Carbs (not the complex kind, the shitty kind).

  • Chocolate (make sure you purchase these before Valentine's Day—you don't want to endure the pity stares of the well-meaning clerk at 7-Eleven when you unload a basketful of chocolate hearts, while obviously wearing your PJs under your coat).

  • Your furry friend or alternatively, someone who won't try to talk you out of crying, wailing or otherwise making a fool out of yourself. Today you have every right to make a damn fool out of yourself.

  • A large bottle of alcohol or a large bottle of sugary liquid or both.

    3. Suggested Itinerary to make the intolerable, tolerable

  • Call in sick with the stomach flu (as in you won't be able to stomach the Valentine's Day cheer at the office)

  • If you must go to work, arrive in black with a veil over your face and tell everyone you had a death in the family (anyone with a brain in their head will give you a wide berth).

  • Bring your children to a relative or trusted friend's house so that you can let it all hang out at home.

  • Buy takeout for dinner—preferably Chinese food as this will be the only place where the staff is used to awkward and antisocial people arriving to pick up their food wearing their PJs under their coat.

  • Watch the first movie (see above).

  • Cry.

  • Get angry and yell at the wall.

  • Cry some more.

  • Laugh.

  • Cry again because now you feel like a crazy person.

  • Watch the second movie.

  • Pass out on the couch and wake up with pillow indents and a heavy sigh of relief. It's February 15th! You made it!

Remember that no matter what you decide to do today, just love yourself. Kidding! You should've seen your face! That was a good one.

But seriously, you will want to sign up for my FREE guided meditation Align with Your True Self because there is nothing better than being connected to yourself no matter what is going on in your life: