Posts tagged #emotional healing

FIVE SURPRISING BLOCKS TO HEALING YOUR ANXIETY FOR GOOD (AND WHAT YOU CAN DO INSTEAD)  

Anxiety overshadows every area of your life.

 Not only do you wake up to waves of dread every morning …

 
When you go to work you feel like no one likes you …

 
You feel resentful of those who seem to have it so easy …

AND

To top it all off, you’re exhausted by the constant aches and pains and lack of sleep!

 

So, you’ve taken the bull by the horns.

You decided that you’re not going to sit around and let the anxiety get the better of you.

You developed some ways to manage and cope with these terrible symptoms.

You feel pretty happy about it—they seem like good strategies and you are very dedicated to doing them every day.

 

The problem is:  YOUR ANXIETY IS WORSE THAN EVER

 

WAKE UP CALL: These strategies are blocking you from healing your anxiety.

How? Because you are creating habits that pull you away from healing the root cause.

The root cause is the central limiting belief, thought pattern, habit, childhood wound and/or family lineage conditioning that built the container for the anxiety to manifest.

If you aren’t dealing with the root cause, you are chasing your tail and losing the time you could have being anxiety free.

 
As an International Medical Intuitive Healer, I’ve overcome my own chronic anxiety, IBS and skin issues at the very root cause. I now dedicate my life and soul purpose to helping you find a way out of the experience so you can be at peace with yourself. So, you can finally feel at home.

 

To really help you and illustrate what I mean, I’ve created a list of the FIVE SURPRISING BLOCKS THAT ACTUALLY LEAD YOU AWAY FROM FINDING THE ROOT CAUSE OF YOUR ANXIETY (and effective strategies you can do instead):

 

  1. You like to be productive

As a Type A personality (which I am through and through), I understand that this is an especially difficult pattern to overcome.  You need to really be honest with yourself: are you being productive or are you are avoiding feeling or knowing something? When we take the time to do nothing and throw out the construct of being useful, feelings, awareness and insight come to the surface. These are your clues to the root cause of your anxiety. Your body and your Higher Self will waste no time giving you the clarity you need.

What to do instead: Schedule a time at least once per day to sit for 10 minutes and do absolutely nothing. You can close your eyes, hold a mug of tea and stare out the window. This is your nothing time. If you have trouble with this then label it as “By doing nothing I am getting closer to healing my anxiety. This is my way of being productive right now.”

  1. You always look at the bright side

This pattern is especially damaging. If you always look at the bright side, your wounded aspects feel ignored and mistreated. Being positive can be another avoidance tactic to stay away from the root cause of your anxiety. What if you don’t feel positive and you ignore it? What will happen? These feelings will go deeper underground into your psyche and resurface as a surge of anxiety. We become anxious when we are trying to control or push painful experiences and feelings away. It is a valuable signal that we have been ignoring our true feelings if we only look at the bright side.

What to do instead: Do an honest journal entry about how you feel. Free flow write for at least 20 minutes without stopping or censoring any words (no matter how shocking they may be!). Use all the words that feel uncomfortable. The more your mind tells you what a terrible person you are for even feeling this way, the closer you are to hitting your emotional release. At the end of the entry, thank yourself for showing up and being real. You’ll be amazed at how relieved you feel. Repeat this 1-2 times per week to get to the deepest core of your feelings.

  1. You love to set goals and achieve them

Goals themselves are not the problem. I encourage you to have goals and dreams and to go after them. The thing to watch out for is when you jump from one goal to the next to the next. If we don’t pause and celebrate how far we’ve come, we never feel like we’re good enough. We also don’t feel like we’ve changed. And this creates more anxiety. I guarantee that you’ll be very surprised when you take the time to see how much you’ve actually changed. When you acknowledge your success, you’ll feel more confident and release the need to pressure yourself into another goal right away.

What to do instead:

Write out a comparison to where you were a year ago with your anxiety and trigger situations. On a piece of paper create three different sections: work, relationships and health. Jot down what you were feeling/experiencing then and how you are feeling now for each section.  Be as detailed as possible. Then do something to celebrate how far you’ve come!

  1. You are humble

As someone who suffered from anxiety for over 25 years, I had trouble feeling good about myself. I felt less than and incapable of doing the simplest things. I found a way to reframe this low self-esteem in a shroud of false humility. It felt better to say: “I’m a good person and good people don’t draw attention to themselves. I don’t brag or talk about myself because that would mean I’m arrogant. I’m a nice, humble person.” The reality was that I felt worthless. Once I healed the wounds that made me feel terrible about myself, I didn’t want to be “humble” anymore. I wanted to talk about the amazing things I could do. Being a good person does not mean hiding your awesomeness!

What to do instead:

Write down 10 beautiful qualities and traits about yourself. If you have trouble with this exercise, think of the compliments you’ve received from others over the years. They are reflecting your essence back to you. It’s your job to accept and receive your UNLIMITED GREATNESS with open arms: that is true humility.

  1. You dedicate yourself to your loved ones

When we make our lives about others to the point of ignoring our own needs and wants, we are doing the world a great disservice. You are depriving others of your greatest self. You are keeping your true potential hidden and dormant. Others who would be inspired and transformed from your presence will miss that gift. Sacrificing your life and health to serve others is an act of self-abuse. You will not get to the root cause of your own suffering if you make your life all about others. I’m not talking about ignoring the needs of others, I’m talking about stopping the destructive pattern of ignoring your own needs. Your loved ones will benefit greatly from your own wholeness and vitality and inner peace. Ten fold.

What to do instead:

Take note of all the things you like to do for others. Now pick two of those things and do them for yourself once a week. Book 1:1 time for yourself and do those acts of service for you. This will help you get to know your needs better (or for the first time) so you can truly heal.

 

Comment below: Which number resonates the most with you or Which one was the most surprising to you? What are you going to do today to start healing your anxiety?

Posted on January 28, 2019 and filed under anxiety remedy.

5 Ways You May Be Sabotaging Your Healing Journey

Why is it that as humans we create endless ways to kibosh our own health and happiness? Are we just a bunch of weirdos on our way to the Masochist’s Ball?

One surefire way to find out: peruse this list and see how many yeses you tick off. If it’s 5 out of 5 then I’m not sure there is any help for you. Kidding! Awareness is the key to pulling yourself off the merri-go-round of misery and placing you onto the clear path of wholeness and freedom.

Here are five ways you may be stopping yourself from getting there:

1.       Blaming others. The easiest thing to do at times is to point your trusty finger at “all the things I didn’t have growing up”, “my family doesn’t support me” or any other reason you deem responsible for your current situation. The act of blaming others robs you of your own personal power and keeps you in a spin cycle of resentment, disappointment, and frustration. When we can accept that we have 100% choice in every single moment to do what we need to do for ourselves, we will make progress.
 

2.       Doing all the things. If you’re constantly leaping from one diet to another, working with umpteen different healers, cleansing every orifice and basically grasping at every straw there is, your body, mind and spirit will be in a constant state of upheaval. You need to tune in and listen to what you need and work with one healer you trust until you see some movement. A hundred methods and modalities are not better than one process that feels right. Stick with a plan and stay with it until you see changes.
 

3.       Expectations. Do you expect your symptoms to go away in a blink of an eye even though it took decades to create them? Are you hoping that if you find the right healer, method or modality, all problems will disappear after one or two sessions? Yes, miracles happen and we can heal “spontaneously”, however we need to lay the groundwork for this to occur. You need to prepare yourself physically, mentally and emotionally to be well. It sounds funny, but this is everything.  
 

4.       Letting negativity take over. We all have sour puss days where we want to grumble and whine and say things like: I’ll never get better! I’m doomed to a life of hell! I hate my life!

We need to honour that—let those emotions out and keep going. Never let these negative thoughts and emotions paint the backdrop of your experiences. It’s like mixing black paint into all the rainbow colours. Give yourself permission to spew out the ugliness in a healthy way (journaling, tapping and talking to a trusted mentor) and then focus on what you want to create.
 

5.       Being a hater. How often do you berate your body? Do you criticize and reprimand yourself for not being good enough? Are you constantly telling yourself that you screwed up again—you should’ve stuck with your plan? This is by far the most damaging pattern. Your body is your companion in this lifetime and is trying to make you happy. Your body responds to all the thoughts and beliefs and emotions that you feed it (the same way it responds to the food that it receives; garbage in, garbage out). So, if you don’t like what your body is doing, take an honest appraisal of what it has to work with.

This list is meant to help you see that the world is not against us and that there is no conspiracy to keep you stuck and miserable and sick. When we know better, we do better. So, if you are doing any of these five things to hinder your progress, now is the perfect time to stop doing them.

If you need help with your healing journey and are ready to focus on wholeness and freedom send me a message or comment below. May you find exactly what you need.  

Five Ways to Feel Like Yourself Again

Just can’t shake that feeling of being totally “off”?

Maybe it’s been a weird day … or week … or most of your thirties bit the big one.

If it seems like you’ve drifted away from who you are … only to find yourself on a desert island of WTF: don’t worry! There is a raft heading your way right now.

First, we need to look at the root cause of why we feel off in the first place. Like how did we end up here with our tattered shirt wrapped around our head, trying to spear fish with our house key?

How did we end up feeling like a completely unrecognizable version of ourselves?

1. What are you doing to throw yourself off?

Take a long hard look at what you’ve been doing in the past few months and weeks (or years) leading up to this lost-self-scenario.

My example would be that I used to take on every project I’d ever wanted to do ALL AT ONCE and proceed to give myself a deadline of yesterday. Time waits for no one I used to tell myself. A couple weeks into this self-imposed boot camp I’m bedridden—binge watching Netflix and wearing the same clothes from last week.

The point is that the patterns are easy to spot once we look for them. Can you say warning signs?!

2. Are you pushing yourself too hard?

Throwing yourself off meet pushing yourself too hard. I’m sure you two will get along great. You have so much in common.

We all know that pushing leads to collapse or burnout or collapse and burnout. Even inanimate objects experience this. As an example, did you know that if you push a coffee maker too hard and make it pump out cup after cup without a break that it will eventually start projectile vomiting water across your kitchen counter? Or, so I’ve heard.

Anyway, we all know that pushing ourselves too hard is a recipe for disaster. Look at what you can do in pieces, one after the other.

How can you space projects out so that you have time to breathe in between?

When can you take time off even if it’s just an afternoon to spend in the park?

Awareness is key so make sure to be on alert for when you’re pushing yourself as opposed to having a healthy motivation for your schedule.

3. Are you asking for help?

Our society can no longer worship the individual. The individual is part of the whole. The individual is part of the group and community that we need so much.

We need that collaboration and support.

We need to feel connected to others as we go for our dreams in life.

Collaboration, community and relationships are the most important principles in life today—aside from sharing love. Without our community behind or with us, we are always going to feel lost or off.

Find your people—whether it’s a social group, exercise group, political group or spiritual group—stay connected. Ask for help. Reach out and do things with others who have a common goal.

4. Getting that desperate feeling

Sometimes we start to panic and feel really out of it. Maybe we’ve gone so far that we can’t really find our way back home to ourselves. Its ok, we’ve all been there. The way back is to reconnect to our True Self.

Find time in the morning or at night to breathe deeply and envision roots growing from your feet into the centre of the earth.

Spend time with your eyes closed and feel the communion with your True Self. Do this regularly so that you always maintain that connection. The source of most anxiety and feeling of confusion is due to the fact that we’ve disconnected from who we really are.

5. What do you love?

What you love is who you are.

What you love is an expression of your life.

When you connect to that, you are connected to your True Self, your core.

This is the quickest way to feel like yourself again:

Reaffirm what you love.

Make a list.

Tell someone.

Make plans to express what you love in the world.

You can’t feel out of it when you are doing or being what you love—it is impossible.

Try to use these five tips as a maintenance tool or a sign post—when you start to feel wobbly go back to one of these steps. And the thing to remember is that no matter how off you may feel, you are never far from your True Self.

Remember: YOU are home.

I would love to hear how you connect to yourself or what you love. Share below in the comments!